If your kid is the teachers' pet and his/her room is tidy and you never have to raise your voice to get the little darling to help around the house, please log off now. But if your kid is high maintenance, one of those troublemakers who may someday be a huge success and laughs about all the agony they caused their parents, read on.
Recently, authorities at Treasure Mountain International School found a few kids in posession of marijuana. For many parents it was a reminder that sutdents as young as 12 and 13 these days are faced with some tough decisions. For the families of those involved it was likely a crushing blow. But we hope those parents and their kids are finding lots of support from the schools, from neighbors and other parents.
Unfortunately most parents are quick to share their children's successes but slow to ask for help when it is needed. When other parents are bragging about their kids' grades it is tough to chime in with "Does anybody know a good child psychiatrist?
Our hope is that in the anonymous shelter of The Park Record blog, local parents might feel more comfortable asking for advice, offering referrals or sharing a few tips and warnings about handling the harder parts of parenting. Please add your comments below.
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35 comments:
This is an excellent thread idea.
Well done!
These kids most likely got the joints from their parents. This is what happens when so many of the people here in town are originally from the cereal state of California. The state that produces fruits, nuts and flakes. Perhaps when these wayward children grow up, they can land jobs working at the Park Record.
I'm hesitant to try to top the useful comments of "Anonymous" on this sensitive issue, but on the off-chance that the post didn't help many families in Park City, I'll give it a shot.
California may produce a lot of pot (marijuana is the state's highest earning crop), but Californians can hardly be to blame for the nationwide problem. A 2005 government survey by the Substance Abuse and Mental Heatlh Services Administation revealed that 37% of Americans over the age of 12 have tried marijuana at least once, and nearly 6.3% use the drug regularly. Drug use affects teens of all ethnicities, personalities, and types of families. No neighborhood is immune - and yes, even over-achieving teachers' pets who clean their rooms can fall victim.
The good news about the widespread use of illegal drugs is the equally widespread availability of resources for those seeking help. Families in Park City struggling with drug use may find these sites helpful:
www.marijuana-addiction.com
www.parentingteens.about.com
www.drugstory.org
www.jointogether.org
They can also contact the Valley Mental Health Summit County Unit at 1753 Sidewinder Drive, Suite 200
Phone: (435) 649-8347
Hotline: (800) 537-8739
Website: www.vmh.com
Anonymous may have been right about one thing. The "wayward children" using pot in high school can turn things around - and still question the status quo in Park City - by landing jobs at the Park Record.
Basically those boys were good kids from good homes so please do not blame their parents. The 8th graders at TMMS are a handful. The girls act like they are in their 20's and the boys are very immature. I really think all their parents need to be a little more aware of what their child acts like at school. The kids need to start taking responseabilty for their actions and their parents need to stop enabling them. They are not little angles they are smoking pot and having sex..Wake up 8th grade parents
I agree those 8th grade kids are a bunch of brats with a bunch of parents who enable them. They are not cute and its only going to get worse once they reach PCHS unless their parents become more involved and quit blaming others for their acts
Shame on the parents of Park City High School students. They are either driving away their boys bsketball coach away or giving joints to their kids.
Great job on this topic Nan, you really brought em out and got them to mix it up.
What these parents need to do with these 8th graders is stop taking them out of school for vacations, buying them cell phones and other electronic devices and start discipling them and making them apply themselves to school. Most of these parents are as self centered as their brat kids
That last blog was probably from the PCHS principal!
The 8th graders are enough to consider not having kids just dogs
Responsible parents in Park City are about as scarce as conservatives and responsible journalists. Most of the kids here have no home training!
The 8th graders are the poster children for not having children..stick to dogs!!!!!!!!!!!!!
7:18 pm, you are so right on. You are a "prophet"
maybe these 8th graders should read these comments to see how undesirable they are. It scary to think they are going to be adults
A note from 'the other nan'
Just want to make sure readers don't think Nan Noaker (me) made the "prophet comment".
This post is not at all what I had hoped it would be . Sounds like the typical "kids these days" old-school complaints.
My view is that we are handing over a scary, complex world to our kids and their behavior is a response to that vast uncertainty...
I am hoping that the mean-spirited comments from those who are so critical of these "8th graders" and their parents are NOT teachers.
I wanted to provide a forum from resouces -- not complaints and so far there have been very few. Any good counselors out there?
Any compassionate teachers?
Any worthwhile programs for parenting/drug education, etc.?
Nan
I am a parent of a child who hates going to school because of these little brats. I have no compassion for any of them. Try talking to their parents they think they are little angles. the school authorities do nothin to control these brats either. I agree with all the comments. Typical park city its about entitlement. We are moving shortly so I really do not care about counseling for these kids., their parents need their heads examined
The last comment stating that school officials are not doing anything is completely untrue. At TMIS, the traditional cheerful holiday assembly was cancelled this year in favor of a stern "behavior expectations" assembly. Students were reminded of school rules, common courtesies, and the consequences of inappropriate behavior in school. A real downer! The school authorities and counselors have been busy talking to students and parents and trying to fix individual problems, but there is a bigger picture here... Is it really the school's responsibility to "control these brats"? Aside from repeated detentions, suspensions, and "stern talkings-to" what can schools do? If kids want to misbehave, they will misbehave, regardless. Besides, I always thought parents were responsible for controlling, teaching, and molding their kids into upstanding little citizens.
Nan, this blog did not turn out like you wanted it to because you have an idealistic and distortorted view of what the world is like in this utopia we call Park City..... You think that the world is made up of bluebirds singing and everybody can just hold hands and live under one tent and we can all get along. Little did you know that there are brats in Park City that are spoilied and are harder to handle that you ever imagined. As an old basketball coach used to tell me, "wake up and die right". There are real problems with the youth in this town and some real hard issues that need to be dealt with. If the parents continue to ignore these issues, they will only complicate matters.. I hope for the best but have to expect the worst!
The last post you got it right. Half of these kids problems are because their parents enable them. Be a parent not their best friend, the friend will come when they turn adults and appreciate the good parenting they were given.
There are some really good kids in this age group unfortunely there are a large number of little privilaged that are making this group be given a bad rap. From what I understad this group has been a problem for a very long time. Not much said on the 9th graders so TMIS cannot be a bad school
Some very interesting comments! If the advice from many of the respondents is followed, this planet will go to the dogs! It amazes me how people can compare a child with a dog. I've got news for you - dogs do not hold any kind of future for us other than unconditional love. It is the easiest relationship a person can have. A mature relationship requires patience and compromise.
It is tough to be a parent, it is tough to stay together as a family, but it is important as ultimately survival of the human race depends on it. Parents need to be involved in their children's school and their activities. The most important thing they can do is sit down and have at least one meal a day together - preferably dinner.
Will future historians look back at the collapse of the American culture as they did looking at the excesses that lead to the fall of the Roman Empire? TVs, Humvees and Labrador Retreivers?
We all need to remember that it takes a village to raise a child and that families need support. The future depends on it.
It does not take a village. It takes responsible parents. If you think otherwise, you are the village idiot!
Seems to me parents today need to spend more time with their children. Too much freedom and privacy allows these kids to spiral out of control... Parents, you need to take some responsibility for the people you are turning out on the world. They are not little adults, they need limits as their brains aren't ready to make mature decisions yet. Dont' cater to every whim your kid has, they also need to learn that you don't always get what you want--and that's healthy. If they never hear no, then expectations will be unreal. Do these kids a favor and spend some time with them. They need you.
Why do we put up with crap that our parents never would have? Did we really turn out so awful that we don't want to make our kids responsible or are we just to busy being their friend instead of their parent. Why do we let our daughters dress and act like 20 year olds? The kids of this day and age are a perverts dream come true. Let's quit buying into the "everybody else is doing it" game and start being PARENTS!!
Between cell phones, internet, video games, etc. we are spoiling these kids rotten and setting them up for a life of "give me, give me, give me".
Wake up parents and look in the mirror when you want to ask "why"
tHESE PARENTS NEED TO SPEND 1 DAY AT tmms AND FOLLOW THEIR DARLING 8TH GRADERS AROUND. mY SON TELLS ME THE GARBAGE THAT HAPPENS WITH CERTAIN KIDS. kIDS ARE BULLIED AND FEELLIKE IF THEY ARE NOT PART OF CERTAIN GROUPS THEY ARE NOBODIES.
I attended a movie at Redstone last Friday evening. The theatre was filled with 12-14 year old punks that have filthy mouths. It is a wonder how these kids got into see an R rated movie. I blame the affluent parents in this town that do not have the guts to discipline their kids. I would strongly suggest that if you want to see a movie, go to the matinee. It is cheaper and you will not have to put up with the disturbing and ugly element of these juvenille delinquents from our town's middle schools. One would have thought you were in New Jersey, L.A., or Detroit instead of "utopian" Park City.
If you are not happy with the direction the kids are taking, making nasty comments and taking the approach that "it doesn't matter because we are leaving" will not change anything. You need to get involved! Kids need positive role models... parents, teachers, and members of the community making a difference. These kids are only in 8th grade! What will they be like 3 years from now when they are Juniors in high school or beyond that??
Kids need direction and support to make good choices about how they conduct themselves. If they make bad choices, there should be consequences.
Hi Nan I'm jordan. I'm an 8th grader and i'm am a good kid I don't do drugs and have sex in my free time instead I go biking . I think that if you want to have a blog about us 8th graders you should actually get to know some of us because we aren't all bad children.
P.S. Do most of you even have a 14 year old?
Jordan:
I am pleased you decided to stick up for your class. I happen to have a seventh grade son and two of his best friends are 8th graders --what a great age! They happen to attend South Summit Elem. but I am sure there are lots of motivated, interesting, unique 8th graders at your school too. I never expected this blog to target one particular group of local kids and I wonder why that has happened. My hope was that parents would share some of the challenges they've had in their families and offer advice to others. Anyway, I think you are brave and smart and I admire you for adding your voice to this discussion.
Sincerely, nan
Thanks Nan I just wanted to add that comment because I meet and know a lot of people around Park City and I just Don't want them to go around saying " Oh those middle school kids get into a bunch of trouble and have bad habits". Think about it. After the incident at TMIS parents took their kids out of that school because they thought their kids would do those kinds of things. That makes us other 8th graders look bad. And what kind of impression do you people out there think about people who are embarassed to move to or live in Park City?
I hate to bring this up, but didn't we experiment with potentially harmful substances when we were young? (Just because we weren't caught does not make us innocent.) And yet, we somehow managed to become responsible, productive adults who worry over our own children. We have become our parents...the very same people we wished would just "mellow out" when we were the young one's interested in new experiences but without the good sense to choose responsibly. I say punish them, inform them of the dangers of addiction and irresponsible sexual behavior, and tell them you love them. Then fact the fact that these kids are no different than we were. And be very afraid.
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